Tuesday, February 01, 2011

Totally badass

Tomorrow, the Badasses and our assorted husbands depart for 5 days in the Bahamas. Don't hate me, because it literally took me most of my morning to get someone at the airlines to let me change our flights from a Philly connection (which is expecting a ton of snow) to a Charlotte connection. Pass the Xanax, please.

Meanwhile, Monkey Man will be here with his beloved babysitter, Miss Heather, who will ply him with chicken nuggets and let him watch crappy TV the whole time. And of course, Rufus will be here holding down the fort until the two hoomans leave during the day and that's when he turns into the Charlie Sheen of Corgis. He's going to order a briefcase of deer poop and hire corgi strippers to come watch pay-per-view with him for two days. Then he'll have to go to the emergency vet for either a hiatal hernia or deer poop overdose. That's how he rolls.

Thus begins my Month O' Travel. Wish me luck on the airplane. I went back to the ENT yesterday to find out that my ear tubes have already fallen out and my eardrum incisions have healed. Ironically, I just got the bill last week so I figure we averaged a cost of, oh, $5/day for the privilege of having my ears sliced open. Not that I'm complaining or anything. And of course, I have six flights within the next three weeks. Probably more than I flew all of last year. I figure if I drink enough, my ears won't fall off.

Have a wonderful week, and if I can manage not to get alcohol poisoning I'll attempt to check in from Joey's laptop. I am leaving my Blackberry at home. Yes, I am insane, but the thought of having to sell a kidney to afford overseas calls isn't very appealing.

6 comments:

C-Myste said...

Have fun!

Do you have a camera? Well, if not at least regale us with stories when you come back to earth.

itsmebuddy said...

Thanks for the laughs! You have a way with words. Have a really good time! Look forward to reading about your trip.

Red Dog Mom said...

Georgia says you can leave the Blackberry w/her for 'safe keeping.'
Have a great time!

penni said...

Have fun Liz -- I'll see you next weekend and we'll smother puppies with love.

Joansy said...

Have a fantastic trip!

Elizabeth said...

OMG, you are a great writer! I found your blog right around new years, but confess hadn't been back til today, and WOW.
Hope you have a nice time in the dreary Bahamas. (At least that's what I'm imagining in order to thwart depression-inducing jealousy.)