Tuesday, November 20, 2007

The mysteries of the male mind, part II

On Saturday night, I finished giving Monkey Man his bath and as we were putting on his little briefs, he stuck his fingers in the little fly part and said, "Mommy, what is this for?"

"I don't know. You're going to need to ask your father about it, okay?"

"I mean, like, what are you supposed to do with this thing?"

"You need to ask daddy," I replied, checking it out. It's actually a "faux" fly and doesn't even open all the way inside the underwear.

"I've got it! It's a pocket! I can put all kinds of cool things in there like my toothbrush or some money!"

I just about lost it.

Then on Sunday night, we were all sitting around my sister's dining room table and I was relaying the story to everyone (ya know because we always talk about underwear at the dinner table). Everyone was giggling and suddenly Monkey Man, who had previously been oblivious to the whole conversation, piped in...

"Aunt Kathie, I could put my iPod in there!"

Egads. Probably a good thing he doesn't have one.

*****

The other night, we had Quentin at our house since his mom Jay was like busy having a baby or something silly like that. The boys were sitting at our kitchen table eating dinner when they got to talking about hospitals and doctors. And this is where the fun begins:

Monkey Man: So my mom's friend Cat Door? He got FOOD POISIONINING.

Quentin: He did? Did he get real sick?

MM: Yeah. He had MASSIVE DIARRHEA. Like it was everywhere!

Q: Ewww.

MM: Yeah, his MASSIVE DIARRHEA was so bad that he fell off the toilet and PASSED OUT!

Q: (shrieking) Passed out? He DIED?

MM: (with a tone that would infer that Q is a moron) No, not passed ON, passed OUT. And then he went into convulsionionions.

Q: Dude, that sucks.

It was all I could do not to laugh until I cried. And Cat Door is only mildly amused that the whole kindergarten of MM's school knows about his MASSIVE DIARRHEA.

*****

Today, I'm thankful for kids. Their minds and how they work is simply amazing, and the laughter they provide is priceless.

3 comments:

g-man said...

Too Funny, it is not only the kindergarten but the entire internet that knows! Sounds like an album cover to me ;) Cat Door and the poopin' machine.

Tanaya said...

The potty humor begins early with the boys. And I'm surprised some marketing genius hasn't already come up with the Ipod pocket for your skivvies. MonkeyMan could be on to a million dollar idea.

Anonymous said...

yes we had to have the "talk" with my 10 year old. It has given me some material for my blog.