The laminated list and other things

After being pestered for the past three days, Joey and I decided that instead of making Monkey Man wait until our usual Sunday morning movie time slot to see Transformers that we would go today. There's only so much whining that I can stand, and I'm not talking about Monkey Man here, people. My husband was like an eight-year-old kid just foaming at the mouth waiting for this movie to come out.

Yesterday afternoon, I had gotten a call from Cat Door who had just gotten back from yet another vacation. I swear to God that he is going to end up living way longer than we are because all the guy does is take vacations - which may be in some ways a cover-up for lack of work, but whatever. I was telling him that we were going to take MM to see Transformers and he exploded just like a prepubescent boy.

"Holy shit, I've heard that movie rocks! I mean, there's something in it for everyone - there's action for the grownups, there's the whole Transformers thing for the kids...and for the women, well, I guess you'll find something in there. Make sure you let me know how the movie is, I am dying to see it!" And yet another instance of how Transformers can totally brainwash a 41-year-old man (albeit one with the mind of a ten-year-old).

Last night while I was looking up movie times, I discovered that Josh Duhamel is in the movie. And really, his part is pretty inconsequential compared to how many times I saw him in a clip or preview...but damn, is that man yummy or what? He looks way hot in that movie. On the way over to the theater, I was telling Joey about my conversation with Cat Door and how I figured even if the movie totally sucked, Josh Duhamel would definitely make it worthwhile because at least I could sit there and drool over him for two hours.

"So, does he make it onto your laminated list?" As in, the laminated list I joke about all the time with the list of potential replacements for Joey in case anything happens to him. Well, no. Josh doesn't make the cut. I mean, what good does it do me to have a movie star on my list that I have absolutely not a prayer in the world of actually meeting, let alone having as a backup to my husband?

And really, the men on my laminated list have to have a specific purpose. Like I need one that's funny and makes me laugh. One who would be a good father. One who could actually do stuff around the house. One has to have a good job in order to provide lots of bling. One for hot monkey sex. Can't leave that one out. And you know, they have to be people that I actually know and could step up to the plate to fill all of my, um, needs.

"Wow, you've given this a lot of thought," Joey said sulkily after I explained the theory of the list.

"Yup. And you know what? I realize now that if anything happens to you, I am so screwed. Because there is no one on the planet that could fill your shoes."

Whew. Dodged that bullet. He was happy then. And the good part is that it's actually true. He does all of the above (well, not so great on the fixing stuff but hey - that's what Cat Door is for) and then some. I'm lucky.

Although now that I think about it, I bet Josh could at least screw in a lightbulb. Like maybe shirtless, a little sweaty, standing on a stepladder, slooooowly screwing...

Oh, damn. Sorry. Lost my train of thought there. Ahem.

So! The movie! The movie was really good. The boys were totally glued to the screen the entire time, and so was I. The plot is thin, but the special effects are amazing. And it's your typical Michael Bay film, so you get what you're expecting - lots of flash.

I think tomorrow we will hit the pool at some point - it has been ungodly hot here and it might almost be too hot to go, but we'll see. Monkey Man and I went Friday afternoon and had a total blast. And I think his swim lessons will be starting at the end of this coming week. Considering that he hates to get his face wet, this should prove to be very interesting. There might have to be some bribery involved.