Apparently my brother and his wife are continuing their quest to dominate the salsa market of the east coast despite their initial troubles. I don’t know if I should laugh or be worried at this point.
I should probably preface this by explaining that my sister-in-law is the queen of trying to make a fast buck. For years, she had conned her dad into letting her have a store that he owned to use rent-free to sell crafts. She had my brother in their basement every night cutting out lovely items like those lawn ornaments you see with the fat woman bent over. It was like a regular sweatshop she had going there for a while, with both of my poor nephews painting all of the cutouts. At one point, she conned me and my mother into hand-sewing some Christmas ornaments we had designed together, only to pay us a whopping $12 for what totaled 30 ornaments. Unfortunately, her “job” also resulted in some of the worst Christmas/birthday/wedding presents known to mankind, because her quality of work was questionable at best. I remember one year she sent my sister a door wreath that had so many gobs of glue from the hot-glue-gun all over it that it looked like it had been attacked by someone who hocked a bunch of loogies all over it.
But between her shop and local craft shows and flea markets, she did pretty well for a few years. Then she started concentrating more on her religious beliefs and would dispense religious counseling to the poor souls that would happen upon her shop. I seriously wonder at times what people must have thought when they wandered in looking for a crocheted toilet paper roll cover and ended up receiving the Word of God. Eventually, she gave up the store and will occasionally do a few craft shows, but the indentured servants (my nephews) went off to college and her cheap labor source was gone.
But enough of that – let’s see the latest update:
"P. and I are trying very hard to get the Salsa sales going. Flea Markets are a tough life. Seems odd after all these years but it could be worse. At least we are selling a good product. The profit is 2.50 a jar and after rent for tables it seems as if this may be our first "Uh-oh". But we have fun together as we awaken at 4:30 or 5 am , watch the sunrise and set up 15 kinds of salsa samples and chips. Our average day is 20 jars. The school fundraising P. was hoping to work with did not do well but maybe in the fall there will be some interest."
Oh no…they’re actually going to do this crap until the FALL? Apparently my brother is retiring after all on April 21 so I guess they will be taking their Salsa Mobile on the road full time. And honestly, I want to know who the hell is going to be buying salsa at the crack of dawn. Watching the sunrise as you’re setting out salsa samples does not sound very romantic nor like anything I would want to do unless being held at gunpoint.
"The man we bought it from said he would buy back anything we wanted to sell him back. We will give it a few more times."
Okay, what is this – some kind of pyramid scheme for selling salsa? I have never heard of such a thing. And I can’t believe that two people with masters’ degrees have fallen for this line of crap and are now investing all of their time and energy into chips and salsa. This is totally scaring me.
"Thank God the days are over at 2 in the afternoon. Afternoon naps may be part of this new life style."
Wait a minute…did she say naps? Maybe this salsa thing isn’t so bad after all. I need that guy’s number.